1) PLEASE DON'T PROCEED IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED THE FILM AS THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS.
2) Dialogues are non-verbatim since I could only type as far as I remember.
I'll be talking about the funny scenes here that those who watched the film can relate to. For those who haven't, you might no longer be able to laugh watching the film. But of course, watching it is another experience.
Just some background:
- Agent Phil Coulson hero-worships Captain America and thus, might be Captain America's no.1 fan.
- Captain America has recently just woke up from the World War II period and thus, is very much outdated with the new technology (obvious, duh).
- S.H.I.E.L.D. is a fictional espionage and secret military law-enforcement agency in the Marvel Comics Universe. (source:wikipedia)
- S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier - headquarters' ship (submarine + aircraft).
Ok, here goes the funny scenes:
Agent Phil Coulson: It really is an honor for me having to meet you in person.
Captain America: Really? Thank you. <some dialogue> How did you find me?
Coulson: I used to stare at your face when you were unconscious. <I smell Edward Cullen here>
Captain America: *aghast*
Coulson: But of course, it's different now seeing you're awake.
Funny Scene 2:
After capturing Loki and locking him up in the jet on the way to the SHIELD. headquarters, Thor (yet unknown to them) disrupted the jet flown by Captain America, Iron Man, & Black Widow and took Loki with him.
Iron Man is about to fly off the jet and Captain America stopped him.
Captain America: We need a plan of attack!
Iron Man: I have a plan. ATTACK! *took off*
Funny Scene 3:
<This takes right after Thor took Loki> After the Loki vs. Thor fight, comes Thor vs. Iron Man (IM) and then Captain America (CA) vs. Thor, and CA + IM vs. Thor and then...
Thor hits Captain America's shield with his hammer. *The Vacuum Force Effect*
Captain America (facing Thor and Iron Man): Are we done here?
Funny Scene 4:
Black Widow (talking about her partner Hawkeye's hypnosis-like state done by Loki): How about how he (Loki) was able to turn people like monkeys?
Thor: I don't understand-
Captain America: I DO!
Captain America: I understand what is meant by the monkey treatment.
Funny Scene 5:
<still, a part of the Helicarrier meeting>
Thor (talking about Loki): And he's my brother.
Natasha Romanoff (Black Widow): He killed about 80 people for the past 2 days.
Thor: He was adopted.
Funny Scene 6:
<Iron Man enters the party of the rest of the Avengers in Dr. Banner/Hulk's office>
Iron Man: *talks lots of stuffs*
Dr. Banner: Since when are you an expert in Astrophysics?
Iron Man: Last night.
Funny Scene 7:
Captain America: Why is SHIELD planning to use the tesseract for new weapons?
Nick Fury: It was his fault! *points to Thor*
Nick: <nonverbatim> There was a time when we were alerted with the strong presence of... A strong force we could not possibly defeat in the future. We are only making steps for future defense.
<Remember in the movie, Thor how Thor went to earth?>
Funny Scene 8:
<mayhem among the group, accusations, one could be a threat >
Steve Rogers (to Tony Stark): Big man in a suit of armor, take that away, what are you?
Iron Man: A genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist ...
Steve Rogers (to Tony Stark): You are just a *blah blah blah...*
Iron Man: And you are just a laboratory rat.
Dr. Bruce Banner/Hulk (explaining about himself): I was exposed to gamma rays *and stuff*
Thor: Really. Humans are petty. Untidy. *some ugly adjectives*
Funny Scene 9:
[Loki, about to make Tony Stark his servant like the way he did Hawkeye.]
[Points his scepter at Tony Stark's heart]
[Utter Failure] *Apparently, Tony Stark no longer has a heart*
Funny Scene 10:
(While instructing Captain America how to save the Engine 1 of SHIELD Helicarrier)
Iron Man: *talks about engines, computer parts, Physics concepts*
Captain America (can't follow Iron Man's instruction): Please speak in English!
Funny Scene 12:Captain America goes deeper into the city and finds the police. [Instructs them things to do]
Head Police Officer: Why should we take orders from you?
<An alien suddenly comes in and Captain America punched it away>
<More aliens come and Captain America defeats them all>
When the fighting ceases:
Head Police Officer: *gives orders to his subordinates, following Capt. America's orders*
Funny Scene 12:After the defeat of the huge-worm-like-alien-robot, the alien crashed the building with the Hulk and Thor atop its head. And then comes their dramatic triumphant walk on the building. And then...
<Hulk punched Thor nonchalantly with his left hand, sending him off the scene.>
*Angry Hulk is always angry. Wants the scene just for himself.*
Funny Scene 13:
Loki: I'm a God! I can't be bullied by a --
The Hulk (as usual, always in rage): *grabs Loki's legs like a doll and hammers him about the ground*
Funny Scene 14:
Everyone looking at Iron Man, in grief. And assuming he's dead.
The Hulk (as about to pour his heart out) screams in rage and sadness.
[Iron Man wakes up in shock].
So there, I could still remember some other funny scenes but I might not pull them off writing them. For those who are yet to watch the film (wow, you sure like spoilers, huh?), are you still not convinced to watch this funny and awesome adaptation of the marvel comics?
The Avengers is a Joss Whedon film. Screenplay by Joss Whedon. Story written by Zak Penn and Joss Whedon. And directed by Joss Whedon (again). Joss Whedon really is a greedy and selfish person. :)) No, he's just that great! He nailed it! I hope the sequel will be equally as great.